Everything but the Kitchen Sink
by roar526
Summary: A collection of 4 short stories about how Mary is fairing living on her own and whether it will change her relationship with Marshall. All stories were derived from prompts sent to me by bujyo over the past week and tie together, sort of.


**A/N: So, I was bored one night and bujyo decided to send me some prompts. That led to more, and more, and even more. They are all so bizarre and random I never thought I'd be able to write them into a story, better yet, write four short stories that tie together. And now, I'm really left wondering just what the heck her kitchen is like since she came up with all the prompts while sitting and looking around her kitchen. Lots of love to bujyo and enjoy!**

**Oh, everything through current season 3 airings implied, but no direct references to any episodes or spoilers.**

* * *

**Sing me a Song**

**prompts: Diet Dr. Pepper, plasma TV, post-it notes, squishy, violins, laundry, Midnight Sun, journey, faithfully, Yankees**

Mary grabbed a can of Diet Dr. Pepper from the fridge and settled into the couch. For the first time in longer than she could remember she had not only the house to herself, but the television as well.

Grabbing the remote to her new plasma TV, she silently thanked Marshall for his excellent taste in electronics. Everyone had tried to convince her that Raph had been primarily responsible for the renovations, but she knew better. Her partner had been the one to secure the funds, and while she had no doubt that her ex-fiancé assumed control over the work crew, there were subtleties in the plans that had Marshall written all over them.

Her office with the built in holder for post-it notes and the poster that adorned its walls, the top of the line appliances and electronics, as well as the very feng shui feel of the house with its relaxing color palette. She only knew of one person that could be responsible. But, for her, the most important thing was that her house finally felt like a home. It made her feel all squishy inside and she knew she'd never be able to repay him.

After flipping through the channels for the better part of an hour, she cursed the lack of anything worth watching and started to feel very alone. She still hadn't heard from Brandi and had no idea what trouble her little sister may be getting into this time. Jinx had moved out and was doing fine on her own. Her thoughts then drifted to her failed engagement until a voice in her head screamed S_uck it up, Mary. There are no __violins__ playing for you. You're just second guessing yourself, again, when you know you made the right decision. _

She was just about to shut off the damn TV when something caught her eye. Placing the remote on the coffee table, she picked up her cell.

"Get over here and don't forget the pizza and beer," she barked into the phone.

"No hello? No please?" Marshall responded into the phone even as he grabbed his jacket and picked up his keys. "Did it even occur to you that maybe I have plans? It is Saturday."

"You got up at some ungodly hour, despite not having to work, and went to the gym. Then, you cleaned and did the laundry before heading outside and taking care of the yard work. You finished about 4pm, took a shower and were debating whether to have a Star Trek marathon or read Midnight Sun when I called," Mary said smugly into the phone. "You mean those plans?"

Marshall racked his brain for a witty retort, but couldn't come up with one. She was right, except for the Midnight Sun part, of course. That was exactly how he'd spent his day and he'd smiled when her name had popped up in the caller ID, hoping she was calling for personal reasons and not work.

"Anything else I can get you on my journey?" Marshall asked instead, closing his front door behind him and making his way toward the truck.

"Like you have to ask," Mary replied incredulously. "I'll see you in 30."

xxx

Marshall pulled up in front of Mary's house with a grin on his face. It had been longer than he could remember since they'd spent a Saturday night together. In fact, they hadn't really spent much time together outside of work since she had gotten engaged. He'd known she was making a huge mistake, but he had vowed to stand faithfully by her side in his role as best friend as long as she would let him. And he was still there, relieved that the couple had come to their senses and ended it.

Balancing the pizza box on his arm, he grabbed the beer with one hand and the pie box with the other. He used his foot to push the door of the truck shut and made his way up the path. When he got to the door, he could hear Mary inside and she was singing. The sound stopped him dead in his tracks and he stood there, listening, entranced by how happy she sounded as she belted out the lyrics.

_I took the zing out of the King of Siam  
I took the starch out of the sails  
Of the Prince of Wales  
It's no great art, gettin' the heart of a man  
On a silver platter  
A little brains-a little talent  
With an emphasis on the latter!_

A moment later, a grinning Marshall was face to face with a not so pleased Mary.

"I just looked out and saw the truck," she said, glaring. "How long have you been standing out here?"

"I just got here," he said innocently, but he couldn't get the grin off of his face and he knew she didn't believe him. He remembered the pie and held up the box, hoping to distract her. "I brought pie."

Mary looked down at the box dangling from his fingers and she relented, stepping aside to allow him access.

Marshall entered the house and walked through the living room toward the kitchen. He placed the loot on the island and glanced toward the TV.

"What are you watching?" he asked, even though he already knew the answer.

"Damn Yankees," she said matter of factly, pushing him aside and going for the pie box.

"Tsk tsk," he scolded, shaking his finger in her face as he smiled to himself about her love of musicals. "No dessert until you eat your dinner, young lady."

Mary grumbled something unintelligible and grabbed the pizza box. Opening a couple of beers, Marshall followed. And as he relaxed into the couch next to his partner and best friend, he saw her smile and couldn't think of anywhere else he'd rather be.

* * *

**A Nip or a Tuck**

**prompts: magnets, lemonade, ballet, sewing kit, facelift, sperm bank, Abraham Lincoln, mouse pad, Iceland, DSL**

On Sunday, Jinx stopped by to get the last of her things from Mary's house and was surprised when her daughter invited her to stay for lunch.

Mary fixed sandwiches and avoided looking at her new stove, which seemed to be taunting her. She had yet to use it and had no plans of doing so in the near future. What did catch her eye were the magnets attached to the side of the refrigerator; they hadn't been there yesterday. She looked closer and realized each one came from one of her favorite take-out places, with phone numbers in plain sight.

_Marshall._

She smiled and shook her head, knowing her partner must have left them there the night before. It was his way of making sure she would eat since he knew she wouldn't cook just for one, and she was touched by the gesture. Remembering her mother was waiting, she shook it off and headed out to the pool with the sandwiches and lemonade.

After setting the modest lunch on the table, Mary took a seat.

"So how's ballet going?" she inquired.

"Oh, it's wonderful," Jinx replied excitedly, always willing to be the topic of conversation when the situation allowed. "The girls are all so sweet and they seem to like me. So does the owner. I overheard her telling one of the mothers that I was once a professional dancer and she was lucky to have me."

"Really?" Mary responded, knowing her mother's tendency to embellish. Deciding it may be better to change the subject she asked, "And the apartment? Are you settling in okay?"

"Yes, yes," she pooh-poohed, "I mean I am a grown woman, Mary. I can take care of myself."

Mary simply gave her mother a questioning look and reached for her lunch. She doubted that Jinx had ever taken care of herself, but sincerely hoped that there was a first time for everything.

"Speaking of," Jinx continued, "I'm taking the sewing kit. I have a couple of things that I need to mend."

"Wow!" Mary exclaimed wide-eyed, trying not to choke on her sandwich. "I don't know what shocks me more, the fact that I have a sewing kit or that you know what to do with it."

"Very funny, Mary." Jinx feigned offense and began to eat, but the silence only lasted a few bites.

"You know, if Jane gives me a few extra classes to teach, I'll be doing very well." Jinx spoke, trying to impress her daughter. "I was even thinking about having a little work done."

"You just moved in to the place. What work could you possibly need done?" Mary didn't want to think about the damage Jinx could do if allowed to redecorate on her own.

"Oh, Mary," Jinx laughed, waving a hand in her daughter's direction. "I'm talking about a little tuck." She moved her hand to her cheek and pulled the skin taut in order to demonstrate what she was talking about.

"A facelift?" Mary questioned before realizing that she should not be as surprised as she was to hear her mother talk that way. "Jesus, Mom, what's next? A trip to the sperm bank so you can try again for that Mother of Year award?

"I do not need a facelift!" Jinx yelped. She was so stuck on her daughter's first comment that she didn't hear anything after that. "I'm talking about a small tuck. Some women take pride in their appearance, you know." And with that, she reached for the lemonade and all small talk between the two ceased.

xxx

"For the love of Abraham Lincoln, what the hell is taking so long?" Mary bellowed as she picked up the mouse pad and swatted her partner in frustration. He'd been tinkering with the damn box for a half hour and she still had no internet connection.

"You're the one that called me," Marshall reminded her, eyebrows raised in response to her tirade. "And I don't appreciate being paid for my services in beatings."

"You call this service?" Mary snorted. "I could fly to Iceland, find Katinka and be back in Albuquerque before you get the damn thing working."

"Just bring me the laptop." Marshall sighed in aggravation as he checked the connection of the DSL cable again. He had been hoping for something other than the wrath of Mary when she had called him this evening, but he realized now that he should have known better. Just last night they were snuggled on her couch with pizza and pie enjoying a marathon of musicals, and hoping for a repeat performance so soon had been foolish on his part.

Mary came back into the room and handed him the laptop. A part of her felt bad for snapping because she knew it was simply a residual effect from her mother's earlier visit. The woman just always managed to push Mary's buttons and when she had been unable to access the wireless internet on her laptop after Jinx departure, she'd had a slight meltdown and hadn't wanted to be alone. That was the real reason she had called Marshall.

"Hey, Mare," Marshall called, pulling her from her thoughts. "Remember on the phone when I told you to check the laptop to make sure that the wireless receiver was turned on?"

Mary nodded.

"Well, that would be this little indicator right here," he said, pointing it out to her. "You see how it has a red x through it?"

Mary pursed her lips and shrugged, knowing she'd screwed up. Instead of admitting to it, she tried a diversion. "Can I get you a beer?"

"Not just yet," Marshall responded, reaching out to grasp her arm gently with the hope of keeping her from bolting toward the kitchen. "First, I want you to tell me why I'm really here."

* * *

**A Parking Lot of Information**

**prompts: keyboard, Information highway, boogie board, Oklahoma, ghosts, shrimp, stained glass, Sistine Chapel, jump ropes, forever young**

Mary picked up her keyboard and slammed it back down on the desk. For the second day in a row she was having computer issues, and despite the incident at home being her fault, she refused to believe that was the case again.

"Information highway my ass," she mumbled. "Parking lot is more like it."

"Problem?" Marshall questioned, eyeing her skeptically from where he sat at his desk.

"My computer froze up," she spat, "rendering it about as useless as a boogie board in Oklahoma."

He smiled to himself at her comment, refusing to let her see his amusement. After getting to the source of her personal computer problems the night before, he had backed her into a corner and forced her to admit that she'd been feeling lonely. The problem was that she left it there and pulled away, leaving him with the nagging thought that he was merely a warm body to keep the ghosts at bay and that it wasn't specifically _him_ she wanted.

Despite the lingering doubt, he had stayed and couldn't deny that the evening had turned out to be more than he had hoped. Mary had actually offered to cook for him saying cooking for two was more fun than for one. Then, she silently showed gratitude for his thoughtfulness as she knowingly tossed her head in the direction of the magnets that adorned the fridge.

They had bickered over the best way to grill shrimp and fell into their familiar banter across the table as they enjoyed a surprisingly nice bottle of red wine with their meal. And by the end of the evening, Marshall had quietly regarded the swirling red liquid in his glass as he thought about his partner. With a pained sigh, he had realized that trying to understand Mary's true feelings toward him was like trying to see clearly through the stained glass of the Sistine Chapel.

"Dammit." Mary's cursing brought him back to the problem at hand.

"Are you enjoying the blaspheme that your quandary has precipitated or would you be willing to acquiesce to the assistance of a colleague?" Marshall drawled as her face contorted and looked at him as if he was speaking Chinese.

"If you're offering your help, then help. But," she responded in a less than appreciative tone, "you need to speak like a normal person and not like a human thesaurus."

"You really know how to make a guy feel needed," he responded sarcastically as he got up and headed over to her desk.

She stood up and allowed him access to her system. Sitting down, he made a few clicks of the mouse before starting to type.

"Did you know that while Chinese jump ropes may be manufactured in China these days," he stated, now having Chinese on the brain. "The game did not actually originate in China."

Mary cocked her head as her hands came to rest on her hips. "Seriously?" she asked incredulously. "I hope for your sake that the spouting of useless information helps a person stay young because it certainly ages those of us that have to listen to it."

"Forever young, Mare," Marshall said with a grin. "Forever young."

* * *

**Buy You a Cup of Coffee?**

**prompts: beach, dirty dishes, blackberries, Mr. Coffee, bar stools, Morocco, weird smell, thermostat, dust, pernission slip**

Mary woke with a start and it took her a few moments to realize that she was in her own bed, alone. She frowned as she untangled her sweaty body from the sheets and headed toward the bathroom to stand under the cool water of the shower for the second time in less than a week.

_Only a dream_ she continued to tell herself over and over again. The only problem was that it seemed so real. Closing her eyes she could feel her feet sinking into the soft sand of the beach as she waded into the warm water and let it envelop her. The sensation of a strong arm snaking around her as the fingertips of the other lightly caressed her shoulder before she turned to face those blue eyes sparkling as brightly as the sea that surrounded them, _**his**_ eyes.

She shivered as she stepped under the cold spray and the thoughts were chased away. She stood there several minutes before drying off and wrapping herself in her robe. Making her way back toward the bed, she sat down and stared at the clock a moment. She realized that there was no way she'd be able to sleep again, despite her feeling that 6am on a Saturday was not an hour at which one should be awake.

Begrudgingly, she stood up and padded her way down the hall to the kitchen. After regarding the dirty dishes in the sink, she decided they could wait until after she had caffeine in her system. Opening the fridge, she pushed aside the molding blackberries to get at the coffee and with a frustrated sigh; she began the process of trying to make herself a cup of coffee with the new fangled contraption in her kitchen. _I miss you, __Mr. Coffee._

She sat down at the kitchen island to wait and briefly glanced at the empty bar stools staring back at her before grabbing the week's unread mail. The bills got tossed into one pile, while the junk mail was thrown into another until she found herself staring at a promotional card with a picture of a beach on it very similar to that of her dreams. She couldn't stop herself from turning it over and she marveled at the fact that it was for a vacation in Morocco. _Morocco_, _really?_

Finally, she heard what she assumed to be the gurgling of fresh coffee being delivered and tossed the card aside. Her hopes were dashed, however, when she turned to see what looked like thick black goo slowly seeping into her mug. Taking a step closer, she noticed the weird smell that accompanied it.

"God damn it," she cursed into the empty kitchen. The entire week had been one annoying problem after the other and she hated the idea of calling her partner, yet again, for assistance. Her recent increased dependence on him had already caused her to question herself; then the damn dreams started. She'd been downright vicious ever since, spending the week belittling and berating him at every opportunity to well beyond the point of being excusable.

Marshall, even with the patience of a saint, had made clear his opinion regarding her attitude with a stony silence and quick departure the evening before. She had felt a pang as he walked out without acknowledging her and she'd stayed well into the night hoping that he'd return so she could begin to try and make amends.

With a huff, she pulled the coffee machine closer to her and attempted to make another cup as she carefully regarded its parts during the process. The pressure gauge and thermostat both seemed to be functioning fine, yet it once again spewed forth the black mess. She pushed the machine aside in disgust and stood with her arms crossed as she stared blankly at the dust particles dancing in the morning light now filling the room.

It took less than a minute for her to make her decision and she headed to the bedroom to dress. She grabbed her keys and was headed out when she stopped and stared once again at the card on the table. Picking it up, she folded it and put it in her pocket as she walked out the door.

xxx

She was standing on his doorstep a half hour later with two steaming cups of morning delight in her hand. _Well, here goes nothing._ Knocking, she took a step back in order to make it easier for a quick retreat, if necessary.

When a minute passed and nothing happened, she began to think that maybe her partner actually decided to sleep in for a change. She watched the door a moment longer before shaking her head at the realization that luck was just not in her corner. As she turned to go, she heard the jiggle of the lock and stopped. The door then opened to reveal her partner still clad in a nicely fitting t-shirt and his airplane pajama pants.

"Mary?" he questioned as he rubbed his right eye and looked at her curiously.

She was glad to have the element of surprise in her favor and hoped that his groggy state would also work to her advantage. _He does look good in those pjs and the bed head is rather adorable._ Smiling to herself, she decided it was now or never.

"Can I come in? I don't have a permission slip," she quipped, "but I do have coffee." She removed one of the cups and held it out to him.

"Um, yeah, sure," he slurred, taking the beverage from her and stepping aside to allow her access. "Come in."

She scooted by him and stepped into the hall as he took a sip of coffee that seemed to pull him out of his sleep induced fog. "Um, just why are you here at this hour exactly?" he asked as he closed the door and faced her.

"Funny thing that," she said, reaching into her pocket and pulling out the ad for Morocco. "I've been having these dreams lately."

* * *

**If you don't like it, it's all bujyo's fault ;) So why not review and show her, and maybe me, a little love.**


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